ok I don't know what just happened but something's not right. I hope I'm just tired. so I was away at the sea side with my family and it was awesome. but yesterday I started to feel a little depressed. I thought it was just because I missed my friends. so today (like 3 or 4 hours ago) I came home and meet up with my friends. It didn't help. I think they were the same as always but I felt like I shouldn't be there. not like I don't belong with them. just like I shouldn't be there. so I was the first one to leave. when I was leaving I felt awful and just wanted to go away. but as I was leaving 2 other friends came and saw me. I sad hi and wanted to stop but at the last second I changed my mind and just turned around and went on. it must have look like I ignored them but I just couldn't bring myself to talk to them. I haven't talked to either of them since I stopped wearing my wig and I don't think either of them knows I have cancer. and I reeally didn't feel like explaining. and as if that wasn't enough some man on the street was drunk and as I passed he said something like '' oh, look there HE goes'' referring to me. I do admit. sometimes I do dress like a boy so I don't mind if people mistake me for a boy when I'm dressed as one, without my make up and everything. but I really wasn't dressed as a boy tonight.
just because I don't have hair doesn't mean I'm a boy. I just want to close myself in my room and not come out until my hair grow back.
''Don't be afraid of the future.''
''change the path your life will follow''
''I have found so much beauty in the dark as I have found a lot of horror in the light''
Be strong now, because things will get better. It might be stormy now, but it can't rain forever.