Well, I've been needing to update.
So, I don't remember whether I told you or not but, Cynthia...
I had seen her both the 19th and 26th. She's going on a trip so, I won't be seeing her for a bit. I don't remember how long. A few weeks..? Yeah, idk.
So, she actually told me how dangerous it is to just flat out stop taking my pills. It'll make me randomly depressed, irritable and in some cases it's gotten people depressed to the point of suicide. I told her I'd get back to taking them, but I've been horrible about it.
Today we had school off so, my day was filled with sleeping, eating, and youtube videos. Yeah, I'm a really healthy person, I know x3
Aaron and I called and I haven't actually heard his voice for a while. All text really. His voice is different so, I just started cracking up and was the entire call. He didn't warn me so, I couldn't help it. Idek how that happened but, it was hilarious. I felt kinda nauseous though (like, my stomach was just off), so I struggled to talk to him. I just had all these weird brainfarts and was spacing out. I hadn't talked to anyone the whole doy (or it was just brief stuff, like I didn't have an actual conversation that wasn't just text). I told him that there was some shit with my psychiatrist so, he wouldn't ask why I was acting weird. He said I was really quite near the beginning of the call but then he realized I was just trying to hide the fact that I was still laughing at him. We only called for like 10 minutes because his parents were bringing a nice dinner, so we didn't have to deal with my awkwardness too long. But at the same time, I kinda wish we could still talk. I don't really realize that I miss someone so much until I hear their voice. I bet it'll be like that with Jade too. Her and Aaron are the only ones I don't see all the time since we don't go to the same schools. I need to talk to Jade but, honestly, I just don't feel like it. If they contact me, I like it but, I just don't do it if it's up to me. Even seeing that I missed Aaron, I still would need him to start the conversation if he wants to hangout or call.
Welp...(half and hour later)
For some reason I really wanted some alcohol but, not just flat out wine or something, So, I had a pina colada with whiskey. Yeah, I know it's supposed to be rum but, I couldn't find it and was too lazy. Most people would find that gross but, I didn't mind it. It was actually quite good but, I only put a little. I do feel a small buzz but, I act normal. I sneaked it without anyone knowing and my sister didn't notice at all. The only way someone would know is my breath. I tried just taking a shot of whiskey but, holy shit...Not the best idea for a newb to alcohol. But at the same time, I'd do it again if I was with friends. But yeah... I feel like barfing so, I'll continue this later. If I remember what I was going to say...
Something to do with pets.
"Some days life is all about your dreams, hopes and visions for the future. But there are some days where life is just about putting one foot in front of the other. And that's okay."